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Why do toasters always have a setting
that burns the toast to a horrible
which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares,
why is there a song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island
can make a radio out of a coconut,
why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time,
point to their crotch when they ask
where the bathroom is?
Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed
if they are
going to look up there anyway?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
What do you call male ballerinas?
Why ARE Trix only for kids?
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap,
he just buy dinner?
Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn,
and vegetable oil is made from vegetables,
then what is baby oil made from?
Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle,
Twinkle Little Star have the same
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
If a man is talking in the forest,
and no woman is there to hear him
he still wrong?
Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over
a billion stars
in the universe, you believe them,
but if they tell you there is wet
you have to touch it to make sure?
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere
call it a hemorrhoid when it's on your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face,
he gets mad at
but when you take him on a car ride,
he sticks his head out the window?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,
"I think I'll squeeze
these dangly things here,
and drink whatever comes out"?
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