In a London department store:
"BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS"
Hmm, I guess the Roof is in the basement.
Outside a secondhand shop:
"WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING -
WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL
Wonder what I can get in exchange for for the kids!
In a Laundromat:
"AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES:
PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR
CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT"
And when the lights go on, we'll be filming!
In an office:
"WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY
PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN"
That's just silly!
In another office:
"AFTER TEA BREAK, STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT
STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD"
Hope the draining board is big, Marvin's been getting kinda pudgy!
Spotted in a safari park:
"ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR"
Everyone else is free to roam about.
Notice in health food shop window:
"CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS"
Sounds about right!
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW
THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR"
If you have children and don't know it, Shame on you!
Notice in a farmer's field:
"THE FARMER ALLOWS HIKERS TO CROSS THE
FIELD FOR FREE,
BUT THE BULL CHARGES"
Message on a leaflet:
"IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU
HOW TO GET LESSONS"
I'm surprised they didn't tell 'em to Write for details!
On a repair shop door:
"WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING.
(PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON
THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)"
This guy's Good!
In a restroom
"TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW"
One word, Eeeeeew!