It's Back to school time,
and we're here to make your school year a little stranger!
Caution, Some of these could get you expelled!
Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes.
Wake up, say "oh geez, better get cracking"
and do some gibberish work.
Turn it in a few minutes early.
Get a copy of the exam,
run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"
Make paper airplanes out of the exam.
Aim them at the teacher's left nostril.
Talk the entire way through the exam.
Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud.
If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure you can hear me thinking."
Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it,
loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this.
I've been to every lecture all semester long!
What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"
Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.
On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way
to refuse to answer every question.
For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds
that it conflicts with my religious beliefs.
Run into the exam room looking about frantically.
Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say
"They've found me, I have to leave the country"
and run off.
Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up,
rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air
and yell out "Happy New Year!!!."
If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam.
Say you lost the first one.
Repeat this process every fifteen minutes.
Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head,
and nothing else.
Do the entire exam in another language.
If you don't know one, make one up!
For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.
Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking.
Blame it on the person nearest to you.
Come down with a BAD case of 24 hour Turette's Syndrome during the exam.
Be as vulgar as possible.
Every five minutes, stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat,
continue with the exam.
As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it!
Walk into the exam with an entourage.
Claim you are going to be taping your next video during the exam.
Try to get the instructor to let them stay, be persuasive.
Tell the instructor to expect a percentage of the profits if they are allowed to stay.
Do the exam with crayons, paint, or fluorescent markers.