You spilled more food on you than the local soup kitchen dispenses.
Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life
to pry you out of the EZ-Boy.
Your after dinner moans are loud enough to signal Dr. Kevorkian.
The "Gravy Boat" your wife set out had 2 fishermen in it!
The potatoes you used set off another famine in Ireland.
You get grass stains on your butt after a walk, but never sat down.
Your "Big Elvis Super-Belt"
won't even go around your waist.
You receive a Sumo Wrestler application in your e-mail.
You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday.
Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy.
A guest quotes a Biblical passage from
"The Feeding of the 5000."
That rash on your stomach turns out to be steering wheel burn.
Your wife wears a life jacket at night in your water bed.
You have 5 TV sets side-by-side to catch all the football games.
Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called twice.
You consider gluttony as your patriotic duty.
It looks like the left-overs are going last until Christmas.